Friday, November 19, 2010

Different Types of Comic Book Readers

We are having some technical difficulties with the opinions section of The Suffolk Voice, so I won't keep my loyal readers waiting. Here is this weeks column:


After a few weeks of straight reporting and being opinionated, it’s time for some levity. We all ready comic books differently. Some like to spoil the ending for the ending, some like to keep everything a suspense until the reach the end. And some are jerks and scan pages and post them on the internet. Here are the categories:

The Purist

This person never EVER jumps up a page. No matter how tantalizing the scenario gets, they can never jump ahead one panel to see what happens. This person will also buy issues and not read them if continuity will be messed up by them reading that issue. Fun to dangle the ending in front of them. Easy to blackmail.

The Observes the High Holidays

This reader is mostly “The Purist” but decides to skip ahead a panel or page when they just can’t help it anymore, like in the final issue of an event. Won’t give away the ending, but might hint at it to tease “The Purist.”

The Accidental Jerk

Person who talks about an event recently after, but thinks it has been long enough that he can talk about big changes when not everyone has necessarily read the arc. Doesn’t mean to be a jerk, but dislocate his knee just to be safe, so he/she learns their lesson.

The A-Hole

I despise this person. This is the person that scans the final few pages of a big comic and posts them on the internet without warning. There is a special spot in hell reserved for them......with child molesters and people who talk at the movie theater. Have any one from the other categories read that thread and watch hilarity/insanity ensue.

Movie Time

“The Walking Dead” is tearing up the ratings for AMC (or should I say noming.....) and has been renewed for a second season

A photo of a HYRDA tank appeared, which will be in “Captain America: The First Avenger”. Thank you British comic book fans for being so diligent.

Martin Sheen will be playing Uncle Ben in the Spider-Man reboot. Sally Field will be playing Aunt May. Looks like Sony is going to the way of the Ultimate Universe.

Speaking of Spider-Man, the musical based on the wall-crawler has been postponed till next year.

There will be no “KNEEL BEFORE ZOD” in the new Superman movie. Zach Snyder says Zod is not the villain.

Disney has hired the writers of “Zombieland,” Paul Wemick and Rhett Reese, to write a screenplay of the Image comics series “Cowboy Ninja Viking.”

Trade/Series for Newcomers

It’s one of Marvel’s biggest series, but right now is a great jumping on point. “Amazing Spider-Man” is ending the Brand New Day, 3x a month thing and going to Big Time. It looks to have Peter Parker finally have some good luck. The title will be released twice a month.

Highlights for 11/17

DC
-Batman Incorporated #1: Grant Morrison’s new ongoing for the Bat, it looks to franchise the Batman and Robin archetype

-The Flash #6: With the big Flash-centric event “Flashpoint” coming up, it would be good to start reading. It also helps it’s one of DC’s best ongoings.


Marvel
-Deadpool MAX #2: The first issue was so vulgar, I can’t describe it without getting censored. It’s the type of book Deadpool was born for, so pick it up.

-Thunderbolts #150: Crossbones vs Steve Rogers? Ghost vs Iron Man? Holy crap, I can’ wait to get this issue. Lots of grudges will be brought up and look for a big battle

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